Modern society has changed a lot over the years. Education, technology, social media, democracy and globalization have changed the way people think and live. Today, many people talk about equality, freedom, women’s rights, education and individual choice. They believe that everyone should get equal opportunities in life.
But when we look at people’s lives at home, sometimes things are different. A person may support equality and freedom in public but still follow traditional rules at home. This is what I call the double life of modern society- liberal in public but conservative at home.
What Do Liberal and Conservative Mean?
Being liberal generally means being open to new ideas. It means supporting freedom, equality and changes in society. For example, a liberal person may believe that boys and girls should have equal opportunities in education and careers. They may also believe that people should have the freedom to make important decisions about their own lives.
Being conservative means giving importance to traditional values, customs and old ways of living. Tradition is not always bad. Many traditions teach us respect, responsibility and the importance of family. They can also keep people connected to their culture and community.
The problem can come when some traditional practices make it difficult for certain people to have the same freedom and opportunities as others.
The double life happens when there is a gap between the modern ideas a person supports and the traditional practices they follow.
Liberal in Public
Today, many people like to show themselves as modern and open-minded. For example, a person may say that boys and girls should have the same opportunities. They may support women’s education and believe that women should have careers and make important decisions about their lives.
People also speak about equality, justice, freedom and human rights. Social media has made these discussions even more common. People can easily share their opinions through Facebook, Instagram and other platforms.
This is a positive change. Education and social media have helped people learn about different ideas and understand problems in society. But sometimes there is a difference between what people post or say and what they actually do.
Conservative at Home
Things can sometimes be different inside the family.
For example, a family may support the education of both boys and girls but still give boys more freedom in some matters. In some homes, girls may be expected to do more household work. A family may support a woman’s education and career but have different expectations after marriage.
Young people can also face restrictions at home. Parents may have concerns about their children’s friends, clothing, relationships, education or career choices. In many cases, these concerns come from love, family values or a desire to protect their children.
However, sometimes these expectations can create a gap between the freedom people support in public and the freedom they are comfortable giving at home.
The Hypocrisy of Modern Life
This gap between what people say and what they do can sometimes become hypocrisy. Sometimes people talk about sacrifice, service and helping society in public while in private they are more interested in increasing their own wealth, influence or power. Of course, wanting a better life for one’s family is natural. The question comes when a person asks others to make sacrifices while they themselves keep enjoying more benefits.
The same thing can happen with equality and freedom. A person may speak strongly about these ideas in public but when their own daughter, son, wife or another family member wants to make an independent choice, they may become much more strict.
They may want freedom for themselves while making many rules for others.
We educated young people can easily understand many of the lies and hypocrisy around us. We see what people say in public and we also see what happens in everyday life. With education, social media and access to information, young people can question things that previous generations may have simply accepted. This does not mean that everything older people do is wrong. It means that young people are learning to ask questions and look at whether words and actions match.
This makes us ask a simple question: How modern are we really if our modern thinking stops at our own front door?
It is easy to talk about equality, freedom and sacrifice in front of other people. The real test is how we behave with the people closest to us.
Why Does This Happen?
There are many reasons for this double life,
One important reason is family tradition. From childhood, people learn the customs and beliefs of their families. Even when they learn new ideas later in life, traditional thinking can still remain strong.
Another reason is social pressure. People may worry about what relatives, neighbours or other members of their community will think. Sometimes they follow traditional rules because they want to avoid criticism or protect family relationships.
Generation differences are another reason. Older people may have grown up with different ideas and experiences while young people are exposed to new ideas through education, the internet and social media. Because of this, parents and children may sometimes see the same issue differently.
There is also a difference between talking about something and actually doing it. It is easy to post about equality on social media or speak about sacrifice in public. It can be much harder to follow the same ideas in everyday life, especially when it affects our own family or personal interests.
How Does It Affect Society?
This double life can have both positive and negative effects.
On the positive side, the fact that people are talking more about equality and freedom shows that society is changing. These ideas can slowly enter family life and bring positive changes.
But there can also be negative effects. Young people may become confused when they hear adults talking about equality but see different treatment at home.
For example, if parents say that boys and girls are equal but give their son more freedom than their daughter, children may naturally ask why there is a difference.
The same can happen in public life. When people hear someone talk about sacrifice and service but see that person using their position mainly for personal benefit, they may start losing trust.
If people only talk about good values and do not try to follow them, inequality and mistrust can continue.
What Can We Do?
I think the first step is to look at our own behaviour. If we believe in equality, we should try to practise it at home too. If we believe in freedom, we should also learn to respect the choices of others.
Boys and girls should get fair opportunities in education and careers. Household work can also be shared more fairly. Parents can listen to their children and allow them to express their opinions while also teaching them responsibility and respect.
People who have power and influence should also try to follow the values they talk about. If they speak about sacrifice and service, their actions should show those values. At the same time, everyone has personal responsibilities and ambitions. The important thing is to be honest about our intentions and responsibilities. We should also remember that every tradition is not bad. Many traditions are valuable and help keep families and communities connected. At the same time, traditions that treat people unfairly can be questioned and changed with time.
We can keep the traditions that are good for us and change the ones that create unfairness.
Conclusion
The double life of modern society shows that people can sometimes live between modern ideas and traditional values. This does not always mean that people are deliberately being dishonest. Society is changing and people are trying to balance new ideas with family traditions, responsibilities and personal beliefs.
But we should still be ready to look at our own behaviour and ask whether we are really following the values we talk about.
Real progress does not happen only through speeches or social media posts. It happens when people try to practise equality, freedom, respect and honesty in their everyday lives.
Being modern does not mean rejecting our families, traditions or culture. It means being willing to keep what is good and change what may treat people unfairly.
In the end, perhaps the simplest test is also the hardest one: look at how we behave when nobody is watching. Our actions at home may tell us more about our real values than anything we say in public.
Ningshok Ningshen
BA 1st Semester
Political Science
St. Joseph’s College Ukhrul Manipur
